Nothing but lessons

So, you meet someone. They treat you like gold, give you all their time, make everything about you and how they can make you smile. But it’s fake. And I don’t understand it at all. I am me. I don’t pretend to be someone else. Sometimes I slam doors when I am mad but most of the time, I am laid back and easy to get along with. I read something today that said something along the lines of, “Dating is just hanging out with someone until you get to know, that you don’t like them”

Why is it so hard to find someone on the same wavelength?  Someone who can be themselves from the beginning. Someone who won’t pick an unnecessary fight with you, gas lighting even, making you feel like you’re in the wrong, making you feel crazy, even though you didn’t do anything. It is so confusing,  dating.  Trying to find the one person you mesh with, want the same things and are actually able to work together daily to build a better life for one another.

How are some people so lucky, as to have come across such a beautiful and delicate thing?

I do know one thing, there is a lesson in all the madness, possibly two or three. I have been blessed to learn such lessons. To have the ability to consciously be aware of my thoughts and feelings and to use them to better myself daily. No I may not have found the King to my palace, but I am a Queen, and I know 100% in my heart that there is someone out there that will treat me as the Queen I know I am. And I will, in return,  show him the same courtesy. It’s not that hard. I just want someone who respects me. Is there for me when my ankle is broken, and doesn’t up and leave me to fend for myself for a day or two. Someone who doesn’t yell at me for having to take care of my children alone and reinjuring my ankle. I just want a partner. Someone who wants to hear from me. Someone who tries to be a part of my life and doesn’t make me feel like a burden in theirs. But! I guess I have to figure out my own weaknesses in order to be ready for when my King arrives. Until than, I will not settle. And neither should you.


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